Fears

I fear unfazed people the most.

I fear those who are always happy.
I resent those who can afford to be ignorant.
I am jealous of the invisible, the unnoticed.

I am wary of equilibrium, the stability,
for it does not lead anywhere... 
I am skeptical of the philosophies,
the promise of a better tomorrow.

I am afraid of me, my wants, needs.
I feel ashamed in donning a mask.
I hate being careful not to lose control
of myself, my complex simple emotions.

There is a purpose of life, they say.
I find these propositions fishy.
To meet, to befriend, to part ways,
all this does not have to have a meaning.

I find it dreadful, to seek company.
Although, I crave for it. 
I seek independence, fearful of it.
yet wishing to  be dependable.

What do I like? You ask.
I like me. I say.
I like a curious mind, I say.
A mind which asks. Asks a lot.

-Ambar